WHY DO I HATE MY WORK SO MUCH?

I should be writing this from the nearest lunatic asylum. (Goodness can I call it that? You never know what’s acceptable these days, but you get the drift?)

I have a problem.

I love writing, I hate marketing. I was married to a salesman in a former life and I know all the buzz words. Listen, discover a problem, solve it and then close the deal. He could sell fridges to Inuits or Eskimos and send them away happy.

Me? Not so much.  As I work on a project – and I was the same with my film making – my enthusiasm has no bounds. I’ll bore anyone silly talking about it, sit and tweak for hours and make it as perfect as possible. The moment I finish it and send to client or publish I hate it. Yes, really.

When I was compiling the box set of the first three Amie stories, I re-read them and thought ‘Goodness did I write these? Hey they’re quite good.’  But at the time, I pushed them out into the world half hoping no one would notice.

I become shy and embarrassed and while getting some one-star reviews does not send me into the fox hole (you have plenty of clients from hell / frustrated Spielbergs when you write for a living) I am basically shy.

I have a long list of what to do before a book launch, but I also have a mental block about doing anything about it. It’s so hard for me to get excited and enthusiastic even when my beta readers rave about the latest scribble.

My fingers refuse to type words such as ‘Great!’ ‘Fantastic!’ ‘Best book you’ll ever read!’

So, A Year in the Life of Belinda Brand comes out tomorrow and I’ve priced it as low as I can, @ $/£ 0.99 but my heart is now with Polly, my newest victim heroine, I’m enthusiastic about her – for now.

So, let me just paste the book blurb and live in hope and I’ll scurry back to my current WIP and Polly who has just won the lottery with dire consequences.

PUBLISHER DESCRIPTION

Belinda Brand becomes an overnight sensation when Hollywood offers to make a film of her runaway bestseller. A confident, modern woman, she has the world at her feet – and a secret she is convinced no one will ever discover. Leah, her gentle and long-suffering stepmother will guess, but she would never betray her, or would she?

When menacing notes appear after the Awards ceremony in London and then follow her across the Atlantic, Belinda realizes someone is threatening to expose her.

As she struggles to stay calm, her best friend disappears, Belinda’s celebrity life turns into a nightmare and there is no one she can trust.

If the Brand family thought they could lead a quiet, normal life, they were wrong. Danger continues to lurk in the shadows.

A fast-paced, page-turning psychological thriller, full of surprises, twists, and turns.