I try, I really do (though DH says I’m very trying, but I’ll ignore that). I had worked out a whole marketing plan in the shower (where else), scribbling it on the tiles in shower gel and shampoo. This time it was going to work. I even put it down on paper, still naked and dripping wet (not a pretty sight at my age). I went the extra mile and timetabled it all.
It went something like this.
While building my email list, I would write a book to give away for free – and those of you who know me, also know that I HATE FREE!!! It was sheer agony to give Amie Book 1 – all of 128,000 words – away for nothing if it wasn’t being toted by Bookbub, and they only took it once. I’m still waiting for Steven Speilberg to come knocking on the door. I had floating images of Angelina Jolie or similar slogging through the hot, parched African landscape minus food and water, fleeing the civil war … but I digress.
What could I write about? Ah, yes the riding school I had in Botswana. It would be a short novella, split into two. The first part I’d blast all over social media and then (here’s the sneaky bit) I’d offer part 2 also free only to those who signed up to my newsletter mailing list. Clever eh?
So I scribbled the first 8,000 words, DH found a suitable pic and up it went on the Big A’s site. Now they won’t take free books, so it had to go on at 0.99 – no problem I thought all the other sites would take it for free and I’ll ask lots of people to squeal on me and bingo, I was ready to roll.
The blurb for this is: Who would be stupid enough to open and run a riding school when they are terrified of horses, can’t ride, without insurance or capital, and with not the faintest idea of how to care for horses. Add to that, two of the four horses are not fit for the knacker’s yard. Yes, that’s exactly what I did – like so many of my adventures I ‘fell’ into this one as well with hilarious results.
Hopefully I’ll get it free soon and you won’t have to pay for it (unless … see below)
Not only that, but every month in my newsletter, I offer another chapter in my back stories for characters in the Amie series. Ben is undergoing the traditional tribal rites into manhood (circumcision with all that entails) and Sam – Amie’s sister – is venturing on her first holiday abroad with horrendous results.
I even pushed back the publication date for Amie book 4 until September to allow myself 5 minutes of sleep a night. By this time I’m hoping to have my street team in place, given all my beta readers plenty of time to tear it to shreds and me to piece it all back together again and have a quick nervous breakdown.
But then of course the wheels came off – they would, wouldn’t they?
Firstly, after a week, the Big A is still offering Worst Riding School at 0.99 and I cringe every time someone downloads it, it’s even got a review!! I feel so guilty asking all that money for such a short half novella. I’ve reported it so many times as have kind friends but to no avail.
Now the month end is approaching when I send out my newsletter and I can only send readers to Bookfunnel to get it for free – which means converting it to all formats and paying for each download. Sigh! More time – result, only 4 and a half minutes sleep a night.
Ah, did you guess I was going to ask you to sign up for the newsletter? I have more people following my blog than the newsletter and I’m too shy to show my face often in the newsletter swap groups, they are all sitting with thousands of subscribers while mine never seem to climb. (Let’s have a big sigh for Lucinda here). It features other authors, competitions and the usual rubbish from me.
Just in case I’ve persuaded you this is the link
and if I could find the font size button here on WordPress I’d make it really, really large – seems they will only allow me to italicize or colour it 😦
Have a great week and I’ll be back next Monday with more travels, history nonsense and work in progress. Take care.