DREAMS OF FAME CRUSHED

For a few moments last Monday I thought that all my dreams of fame and fortune were about to come true. I received a pm on my Face Book page with an invitation to friendship from a smiling girl with a parrot on her shoulder. She told me she worked for Amazon in the e.book ranking department. This was it, the breakthrough I had been waiting for! Apart from asking questions about the parrot which I thought rather intriguing, I just hoped she might spill the beans on how they decided to rate the books and I would get inside tips, which I was going to share with all my writer friends, and every time anyone logged on to Amazon our books would be up there on page one just begging to be bought.

It didn’t take too long for her to ask me for my email address and bank account details as she had a $6 million prize to send me. Another Nigerian 411 scam, my hopes were dashed. Surprisingly when I refused to give both pieces of information, she cut herself off and I’ve not heard from her again.

But you have to admit, these scammers are getting more savvy. They know our weaknesses, and are quite prepared to play on them. So it’s back to the drawing board and on with the history lesson.

We left off as England was being invaded by just about every other inhabitant on the planet, especially the BRUTAL Saxon invaders who drove other Britons westward into Wales, FORCING them to become Welsh. And a Saxon warrior Hengist with his wife Horsa made himself king in the south and some say he was possibly the first King of England,

SAXON WARRIORS

[Please note I am pretending they are standing in a field of daffodils, the Welsh national flower].

However, this plaque on the wall of Bath Abbey announces that Edgar was crowned there as the first King of all England in AD 973. You can safely ignore the date, I  don’t go in for them in a big way myself. Even in those days they didn’t always get it right. Apparently Edgar is the 29th great grandfather of Queen Elizabeth II, now who would have guessed that?

But now we come to the EGG Kings.

KING EGBERTEGBERT 2

Another version tells us that England was still divided into seven kingdoms, and there were a series of Egg and Eth kings, such as Eggbert, Eggbread, Ethelwulf, Ethelred, Ethelunready, Ethelbald etc. but not much is known about them. So we’ll quickly whizz past those and pick up again in a couple of days.

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